Deal Breakers?

Asalamoalaykum warahmatullah,

We all agree that there’s nothing perfect in this dunia but still we seek perfection in whatever we want in this life. If it’s a university program, we want the university to be prestigious, have the best research-based standing in the world, it must have scholarships AND it should be nearby where we live. Likewise, if it’s something insignificant as clothing, we want it to suddenly make us look wonderful, be of a long-lasting material (durable) AND be very very affordable. SubhanAllah. It seems like we’re always looking for the best option-which in itself is nothing wrong- but as a consumer we get so used to getting what we want that we can no longer deal with compromises in life.

You come to a point in life when things of ‘good quality’ are no longer available. You wonder there’s somethingwrong with the manufacturer companies nowadays or it’s just another trial that people of your generation, people of your kind will have to face. You have to resort to just ‘making-do’. And that’s when the problem starts and Mr. Shu-shu starts kicking in with his mountains of doubts.

At this point you have to push away the mountains of doubts and sit down and think neutrally. You would have to ask yourself that even if that object’s missing a few things you’re looking for, is it really a deal-breaker for me? What’s important for me to get out of buying a certain object or choosing a certain option? Will it give me enough so that I can easily get to where I want? Am I being unjust to those who’d be affected with this decision of mine? Also, am I being unfair to those who may be affected by this decision in future? And most importantly, am I being thankless by overlooking how significantly positive it may be for my Deen just because it doesn’t fit in a certain rubric of dunia-related criteria?

After deciding, a little amount of Tawakul will definitely help, don’t you think?

And by the Mercy of Allâh, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you; so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allâh’s) Forgiveness for them; and consult them in the affairs. Then when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allâh, certainly, Allâh loves those who put their trust (in Him).If Allâh helps you, none can overcome you; and if He forsakes you, who is there after Him that can help you? And in Allâh (Alone) let believers put their trust. [Surah Ale Imraan, 3:159-160]

You may consult the whole world but you can never ever take care of everything. It is Allah SWT to whom perfection belongs and He SWT gifts us all the time. No human should have the arrogance to think that they have the right to turn away a blessing of Allah SWT just because a thing or two are missing. People say that they’re being ‘rational’. SubhanAllah! You can never ever satisfy your heart by your rationality in matters concerning the Unseen. Interestingly, He SWT not only controls the outcome of events but also the hearts. He can tilt them towards what seemed a major deal-breaker and he can tilt them elsewhere. So you may use your rationality all you want but what your heart seems to incline towards right now may become the most despicable thing to you a year from now. How can we assume that it is us deciding? We make the efforts, pray to Allah SWT that it brings forth khayr and we should then become biased. Yes biased only towards what good it will bring to us for our Deen! There can never be a decision that you make in which there’s an equal ratio of materialistic to Akhira benefits. There are always trade-offs. In the glitter of materialistic benefits, even the strong-hearted practising Muslims lose control. The glitter of dunia has that strong of a magnetic pull. All of a sudden, origin becomes so important that Deen- the Ni’ma that gave you life-is thrown out of the window. Really, are superficial things a deal-breaker for you?

Why not for a change make Allah SWT pleased by overlooking these minute things and take a leap of faith for His Sake?

Is not Allâh Sufficient for His slave? Yet they try to frighten you with those (whom they worship) besides Him! And whom Allâh sends astray, for him there will be no guide. [Surah Az-Zumar, 39:36]

Do not worship your desires for there’s no end to it. It’s like asking someone who is sick to run a marathon. That is the nature of this dunia. We demand from it things it can never give us…we ask for unlimited happiness from this poor dunia which is itself so limited…

Your rationality and taking all precautions will take you nowhere. While it is good to research and be careful, let it not make you relaxed that nothing can mess up because Allah SWT has said:

Truly Allâh has given you victory on many battlefields, and on the Day of Hunain (battle) when you rejoiced at your great number but it availed you naught and the earth, vast as it is, was straitened for you, then you turned back in flight. [Surah at Taubah, 9:25]

Never be upset if you don’t have the right options infront of you. You never know your heart may get inclined to them soon. Likewise, don’t rejoice if you get the ‘perfect’ thing because it is posible that Allah SWT will change your feelings about it in future. But what you can do is this:

And put your trust (O Muhammad SAW) in the Ever Living One Who dies not, and glorify His Praises, and Sufficient is He as the All-Knower of the sins of His slaves; Who created the heavens and the earth and all that is between them in six Days. Then He rose over (Istawâ) the Throne (in a manner that suits His Majesty). The Most Gracious (Allâh)! Ask Him (O Prophet Muhammad SAW, concerning His Qualities, His rising over His Throne, His creations, etc.), as He is Al-Khabîr (The All-Knower of everything i.e. Allâh). [Surah Furqan, 25:58-59]

He SWT knows your sins. What you get or may not get may be due to your sins. Just put in necessary efforts, have reliance on Allah SWT and increase in Istighfaar. We wouldn’t want to suffer and not get the ‘best’ thing out there just because the mountains of our sins. Have a self-corrective approach rather than a dunia-blaming approach. Analyze how you can become the best person/best option out there rather than only seeking the best thing.

And Allah SWT knows best.

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4 Responses to “Deal Breakers?”

  1. as-salam3laykum wa rahmatullah ukhtee :)

    jazakee allahu khayr, I appreciated the message of that post. I also find it very clever mashaAllah how you seemed to be speaking about a very specific topic, in seemingly general terms, and I could definitely be wrong, but I think it is about that specific topic. But since you did not mention it, I too will not mention it, out of respect for your wishes inshaAllah. :)

    May Allah swt grant us good in this world, and in the next, and save us from the Hellfire. ameen
    And may He swt protect us from the delusions of the dunya. ameen

    wasalamualaykum
    ommal muqarraboon

    • Walaykum asalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Dearest Sis,

      Awww, really appreciate your thoughtfulness :)
      Ameen to your duaas.
      Please feel free to comment in however way you like. It’s a public forum, I do accept all forms of comments from sisters. Besides I have the power to moderate so don’t worry about it at all…hehe.

      Wa iyyaki and may Allah SWT reward you for coming here.Ameen.
      Love,
      -UmmS.

  2. Jazakallah khayr for the reminder. I would also encourage performing Istikhaarah before taking any decision — major or minor. It’s a beautiful dua of tawakkul and guidance. I personally have had no regrets so far ..and I know I won’t in the future. Alhamdulillah.

    • Mashaa’Allah, good for you akhi. JazakAllahu khayran for the input.

      May Allah SWT make the decision-making process easy for those who seek to please Him. Ameen.

      Wasalamu alaykum warahmatullah,
      -UmmS.

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